28 Mar We’re Leaving for the Jungle 🙉 (Seeking Miracles)
We accepted an offer on our house!
There are so many emotions in my heart right now that I HAVE to write about them. I need to feel as if I am writing TO someone, so I’m making this a blog post and not just a journal entry and maybe I’ll even publish it 😉
First, a little backstory…
The Backstory
When we decided to sell our house to move to Mexico (to start a school to help kids see and live up to their potential, regardless of their circumstances), we thought we would need to go in the winter.
There were two reasons for this.
One was that we didn’t want to procrastinate a prompting about something that felt right.
The second reason was that Benjamin Allen (the owner of CLAS ropes, who said he would build our ropes course at cost) could only go in winter. Bill wanted to have the ropes course as a revenue stream before quitting his job and moving us out there.
However, I had commitments to the school in Provo so I felt bad cutting out early. I was also worried about just building a ropes course and assuming people would come. I thought it would be better to live there for a while first and get a feel for the needs and the culture before we just assumed what we would need to start with.
The kids did not want to move in the winter because they also wanted to finish their classes and commitments here.
So we decided to do our part. We would sell our things, put the house on the market, and leave the timing in God’s hands. We thought it would likely sell quickly so we even sold most of our winter things.
Well, it didn’t sell. People came to look at it. Some expressed interest. One couple almost made an offer but then the husband had some health challenges.
As the months went by, incredible people donated to the cause in Mexico. Some are making monthly donations. A sweet friend created a charity Bazaar and many came to sell their creations to donate. We were so inspired by people’s goodness.
We decided that because of their goodness, we could rent our house out if it didn’t sell this summer and we could get started in Mexico. We had enough to build a small home. We could start there, see the needs, find ways to make money filling those needs; and have faith that God would continue inspiring good people to help.
We kept showing our house assuming that God would send the right people before the summer season or we would rent it out, but we were losing hope that it would sell because of the rising interest rates. Many houses were marking down their prices, but we didn’t want to do that because we needed to get my parents enough from their share in the equity to retire comfortably and at least a little extra to build a little school in Mexico and create a business or some way to make an income.
The Offer
Well, an offer came in this week from a family that seems amazing. I love thinking about how our paths needed to cross at just the right time, and God orchestrated it so that they would.
The closing date they wanted is May 22nd, which is exactly the week after the last week of all of our commitments and classes.
With that revenue and the donations we have received, we hope we will have enough to build a small home, a small school, a volunteer dorm this summer, and a ropes course in the winter. If we are careful, we can survive off it for a little while until we start creating income and gathering more donations.
Isn’t God so good??
Now, I realize I am writing this a bit prematurely. There is a chance that the offer won’t go through… it is not all said and done yet. BUT I know that our God, who is so good, and works all things out for our good, will continue to be who He is; so if it doesn’t work out, He will have something even better in store as we continue to wait on Him.
But seriously, isn’t this timing so merciful to my kids? And also to my husband, who was struggling to be in two places mentally for so long. I feel so, so grateful.
Reality Sets In
Along with gratitude, there are many other emotions for everyone in the family. On the day of the offer, I had one younger child who was really angry that we would accept it. Another two were really sad about everything they would miss this summer.
The littles didn’t know how to handle their emotions and took them out on each other. I was feeling so overwhelmed with all we would need to get ready before leaving (especially the Find Your Path program and website that I want to have running on autopilot. I won’t have much time to do more than blog, podcast, and video after we leave.)
Some of these decisions are also making my husband and me to have to address some communication issues that we have been able to shelf before. We could no longer ignore them as we needed to move forward in a unified way. This was also overwhelming.
I was about to explode with the overwhelm and heaviness, and I knew I needed to get out for a bit, but it was so windy and snowy. My boys asked if I would take them to the gym so they could play ping pong, and I decided to go with them and run around the track.
I saw a friend at the reception desk, and I almost burst into tears when she asked me how I was feeling. I had lots of pent-up emotions to work out.
I ran and ran. I wanted to listen to a new song I had seen on my recommended list as I ran, but my mind kept wandering as it played, so I kept restarting it. I think I restarted it for half an hour before finally paying attention to it all, but it was just what I needed. It’s called Sunday is Coming by Phil Wickham:
It reminded me that there are hard days in all good things. And that Satan will work hard to make us give up, but that we don’t need to worry: “Friday is good because Sunday is coming.”
Today
I’m still overwhelmed by all there is to do and how little time I have to do it. Whenever I sit down to work on the website or program, someone needs me. I try to get up early to do work on it, so I don’t need to worry about it when the kids are awake, but it seems like I get so little done compared to how much there is to do.
I am also sick, and so are several of my kids. I’m not sure what we have, but it is really hard to kick it. Jessalyn has been in bed for almost a week. Dallin is going on five days, and I am on day two. Cassia is over it, but she also had it for about a week. The buyers are coming to do an inspection of the home on Monday, so I hope we have at least enough energy to clean and then find somewhere to go for 3 hours.
However, today I also feel a sense of joy about it all. Yes, it’s more than I can handle, but that is the case with almost all I take on in my life, and I have learned to trust the God of miracles. Somehow he makes it all work out, in His time, in the way it needs to work. What a ride life is!
Expecting Miracles
A while back my daughter asked me, “What does it mean to expect miracles?” She had heard a talk in which our prophet suggested five specific actions to help maintain our positive spiritual momentum.
Number 4 was to “Seek and Expect Miracles.” He said:
God has not ceased to be a God of miracles. EVERY book of scripture demonstrates how willing the Lord is to intervene in the lives of those who believe in Him. He parted the Red Sea for Moses, helped Nephi retrieve the brass plates, and restored His Church through the Prophet Joseph Smith. Each of these miracles took time and may not have been exactly what those individuals originally requested from the Lord.
In the same way, the Lord will bless you with miracles IF you believe in Him, “doubting nothing.” Do the spiritual work to seek miracles. Prayerfully ask God to help you exercise that kind of faith. I promise that you can experience for yourself that Jesus Christ “giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength.” Few things will accelerate your spiritual momentum more than realizing the Lord is helping you to move a mountain in your life.”
My daughter said, “I don’t feel like I should be asking to see miracles, it feels like asking for a sign. What did the prophet mean?”
This is what I have come to understand in my life and what I told my daughter,
“I think it means that you plan to do something great for the world, something that maybe seems impossible, and you get started baby step by baby step. And then you expect that somehow God will take those baby steps, your widow’s mites, those tiny seeds…and somehow grow them into that impossible dream you so desire to see.”
So that’s what we’re doing. We know so little! We have so little to offer. But we know God. We know we can trust Him to take a willing heart and do great things with it.
I don’t expect it to be easy. I expect it will be hard, and we will wonder what in the world we got ourselves into and wish we could have our comfy home back sometimes, and we will miss our friends and family and will hate the mosquitos, but I also know He will be with us through the process and comfort us and guide us.
The relationship we will build with Him through it all will make whatever happens worth it. I expect miracles ❤️
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